"It's like they hired a bunch of drunken Bulgarians to design the site"

It's not just that it doesn't work, freezes up or locks your entire computer.
Simply moving around the site is like a visit to the airline reservation sites in the early 1990s. 
Except this is worse.
20 years ago, if you really, really kept at it, you might be able to make your reservation online.
And if not, you could call a travel agent or the airline.
And make your reservation.
I'm not sure there's enough vodka in Bulgaria to make ANYONE drunk enough to produce the "Detroit-in-website" that Obama's minions have "built". 
And $600+ million is just the starting point.