What happens when a soldier dies - The Washington Post

What happens when a soldier dies - The Washington Post:
"...We choose to serve.
And when we choose to serve, sometimes chance chooses us.
Every deployed service member leaves behind someone who cares, someone who, when giving one last hug before their warrior ships out, feels their pride clash with the fear that this last hug might be the last hug. 
After that, every call from an unknown number, every unexpected knock on the door, reignites the constant worry in the daily lives of those on the home front, making them shudder at the prospect of what might be.
When an American service member is killed overseas, a casualty assistance officer, or CAO, tries to reach the family in the morning, in the relative privacy of their home, rather than making a call to an office or lingering in the neighborhood, waiting for a spouse or parent to come home.
The families might hear the closing thud of car doors — CAOs always travel in pairs — and then see two service members in dress uniforms approaching their door.
Some greet the CAOs on their doorstep, knowing there is only one reason anybody wearing that uniform would be visiting.
Others slam the door in the officers’ faces or even forcefully confront them.
It takes a resolute heart, edged with compassion, to ask:
“Are you — ?”
Some have tears welling in their eyes; some stand with stoic poise; others are in dumbstruck shock; but when they reply “Yes,” the next words deliver the crushing news: “We regret to inform you that . . . ” They hear the name and the word “killed,” but everything else comes as a blur."