15 Fun Communist-Themed Olympic Events At Beijing This Year | The Babylon Bee

15 Fun Communist-Themed Olympic Events At Beijing This Year | The Babylon Bee

• Here are just a few of the new games Beijing is adding to the mix this year:

1) Uyghur Luge: Competitors slide down the side of a mountain on a live Uyghur prisoner. Radical!
2) Uyghur Biathlon: Exactly like the standard Ski and Shoot Biathlon, but you shoot Uyghurs.
3) Competitive Virus Making: A competitor from Wuhan is the current favorite.
4) Men's Cross Country Lab Leak: A companion event to Competitive Virus Making. Athletes are judged in time and plausible deniability.
5) iPhone Factory Roof Diving: Featuring celebrity judge Tim Cook of Apple!
6) Social Credit Scoring: But if you lose you get shot...Read all.